Author Archives: Bob Evans

Sunday Night Movie: The Sword and The Sorcerer

So last night I was in the mood for something fantastic. By that I do not mean something of such tremendous quality that decades later people ares till amazed with the filmmaking, but rather in the mood for a film that dealt with a fantastic premise.

Thanks to my new nifty database program, I was able to sort the movies by time, I was looking for something under one hours fifty minutes, and then I just scanned the titles until I saw something that struck my fancy.

So The Sword And The Sorcerer is a fantasy film that came out in 1982 about the same time that Conan: The Barbarian was released into theaters. While Conan was a big budget film, 20 million dollars, which grossed nearly 40 million dollars domestically, The Sword And The Sorcerer was a much more modest production. Reportedly The Sword and The Sorcerer was made for the price of a single set on Conan: The Barbarian, and yet it still gross 39 million dollars domestically as well. Clearly the better return on investment went with the little film that could. Continue reading

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Databasin’ fool

So I have spent a few hours this morning databasing my DVD/Blu-ray collection.  I have according to the database 222 movies in my collection, but this number is not completely accurate. The database software counts boxed sets as a single entry, so for example my boxed set of the Star Wars movies is one entry, but it has three movies.

Given that my feature film count is closed to 290 from boxed sets. (The el cheapo 50 ‘classic’ horror films bosted that count by 49 alone.)

The database software is Movie Collector and I love it. After the jump is a screen capture of what it looks like. The software cost me $30 so it is not pricey. You can enter films by title, barcode number (typing it in by hand) or by scanning the barcode on the box of the DVD/Blu-ray. I bought a cheap barcode scanner off Ebay ($8) and it took me just a couple of hours to enter all the films. Continue reading

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Political Monsters

So, off the top of my head here are some correlations between select politicians and the D&D monster that best represent. This is list is for from exhaustive.

Bill Clinton: Come on this was a gimme, a Satyr. Nothign else fits this horny old goat.

Hillary Clinton: A harpy.

Sarah Palin: No doubt about it in my eyes, a Succubus. All charm and deception while she bleed you dry.

Barack Obama: A Rakshasa The shaping changing tiger that is smart, charming, and deadly. You never know exactly who he is cause he’s never in he real form.

Joe Biden: His’s the Gnome.

more when I think of them.

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Not Much tonight

Been too busy playing with my latest toy. I got a barcode scanner — the very affordable CueCat — and now I can enter my DVD’s and Blu_ray in a database just by scanning the barcode. It’s very cool and I know that I will spend hours on Saturday entering movies.

I just noticed for the first time that I had lots of comments in my spam filter. I went though and not everything was spam. I’ve tried to approve the comments that looked legit but I might have missed some. If they were yours, I apologize. That is certainly no way to build a community.

Looks like Is John McCain A Vampire got some action. Maybe I should consider what other monsters or D&D monsters various politicians are.

I already know who the Gnome will be. LOL

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Is John McCain a vampire?

It has occurred to me that we might want to ponder the question; Is John McCain a vampire?

Let’s consider the interesting coincidences.

Vampires are hard to kill: John McCain has proven to be very difficult to kill. Over the course of his naval aviator career McCain survived five crashes, to of which were incidents where he aircraft was hit by missiles. He survived all of those events. (It is interesting to note that the fourth incident on the USS Forestal was a Zuni rocket from a friendly craft misfired and hit the plane John McCain was it. An accident? or did someone suspect he was a vampire?)

Even after surviving the fifth incident where he was shot down by enemy fire and severely wounded after ejecting, John McCain proved to be inhumanly tough. Surviving an enraged mob, and years of torture and mistreatment at the hands of a ruthless enemy.

Vampires do not tolerate sunlight well: John McCain is well known for his devotion to sun block and wearing of hats outdoors even on cloudy days. Despite this is has had two brushes with skin cancer. Again he’s tough to kill and clearly does not tolerate sunlight well. (I will point out that not all vampire explode in sunlight. Dracula in the novel of the same name ventured out in sunlight, it robbed him of his powers.)

Vampires have an unnatural ability to charm people: Clearly John McCain has supernatural charming power. He has survived political scandals that would have sunk others, yet he continued to win the loyalty of his voters. In 2008 when serious conservatives vowed not to vote for John McCain, they were strangely effected by election day and cast their votes for a man they despised.

Vampires survive by taking life force from others and extending their own lives with it: McCain second life as a politcian has been fuel by his younger wife’s Beer fortune. Clearly he has extended his life with her blood money.

But perhaps the most troubling thing and best evidence that John McCain is a vampire.

John McCain has no soul.

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Sunday Night Movie: 2012

So being a fan os disaster movies, and to a somewhat lesser degree a fan of disastrous movies, withe the release of 2012 on Blu-ray I had to make that movie my Sunday Night Movie this week. (before anyone thinks I slipped a cam and actually bought the Blu-ray, I ordered it via Netflix.  That’s one of the reasons I have Netflix, so I can see movies I would not ordinarily pay for.)

As I have said in other posts I thin Roland Emmerich is in a race with Michael Bay as to who can make more stupid movie. After Michael Bay raised the stakes with Transformers : Revenge Of The Fallen, Emmerich had no option but to go all in with 2012.

Like all really classy disaster movies this one has a diverse cast from all sorts of walks of life caught up in the disaster. They struggle to survive, many failing and ending up in either noble moving deaths if they were likable characters, or ironic fitting deaths if they were jerks. There isn’t a single surprise in this entire films save for the level of stupid.

For example, the scene picture above. Jackson Curtis (John Cusack) failed writer whose HARDBACK book sold less than 500 copies (a face many people know in the film, no matter how divorced those characters may be from the publishing business.) is running to catch the plane with his ex-wife, two kids, and their new step-dad in order to escape the eruption of the super volcano beneath Yellowstone National Park. Behind the character is the slowest pyroclastic flow in the recorded history of vulcanology. In real life this effect can have speeds up to 750 km/hour. Jackson has managed to outrun the bit of disaster in an old RV. Crashed the RV into a fissure from the eruption, climb out of the fissure, chase down the plane with family et al aboard, and still manage to escape the deadly winds, pressure, and temperatures of up to 1000 degrees C. Now to paraphrase Morbius from Forbidden Planet: Prepare your minds for a new scale of stupidity values. What I just describe was the most CREDIBLE disaster/action/escape sequence in the whole film.

I laughed my way, and I mean that quite literally laughing out loud, through this entire movie. From the ridiculous  psuedo-science (Sub-atomic particles do NOT mutate Mr. emmerich, they decay.) to the ignoring of the vast distances involved this film gets everything wrong and does it in the most over the top manner imaginable.

It is filled with stock character, not one of which has any spark of originality and life. It ignores the consequences of its own stupid actions and stands.  SPOILER ALERT.

Continue reading

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No Sunday Night Movie post tonight

This is because it took me two nights to watch my Sunday Night Movie feature.  The film was 2 hours 37 minutes long and tomorrow I will tell you what I watched and how hard I laughed. (Not a good sign as it was not a comedy. Here’s a hint, I much preferred  When Worlds Collide.)

Today I got my new computer glasses with an Rx designed for use at a range of about 22 inches. It seriously reduced the eye strain I had at work and for most of the day and early evening I was feeling fairly good. The headaches returned to full force by the end of the evening because for everything else I am still using glasses that are out of date and my eyes are just too damn sensitive.

Talk you to tomorrow.

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Movie Review: The Ghost Writer

Today my sweetie-wife and I went to the movies and saw The Ghost Writer. This film is a political thriller directed by controversial director, Roman Polanski. (The link is to Mr. Polanski’s IMDB page, but if you want to do a Google search you’ll easily turn up the nature of the heated controversy surrounding Mr. Polanski  and he decades long flight from US law.)

Adapted by Roman Polanski and Robert Harris from a novel by Robert Harris, The Ghost Writer is about an author, The Ghost (Ewan McGregor) who has been brought on to complete an autobiography for a retired Prime Minister of England, Adam Lang (Pierce Brosnan) after the previous ghost writer has died in a accident at sea.

When the ghost arrives he finds that the political teams he is to work with is in a state of siege as a former member of Lang’s cabinet has leaked documents accusing Lang of war crimes while in office. (The plot here is very topical with the war crimes being handing terror suspects over to the Americas for torture.) Lang’s chief of staff, Amelia Bly (Kim Cattrall) run the operation with a ruthlessness that suggests her name should more properly be spelled Bligh. Lang’s wife, Ruth (Olivia Williams) is estranged and distant clearly in a contest against Bly for her husband time and possibly affections.

Naturally there are secrets afoot and perhaps the death of The Ghost’s predecessor was no accident. As I said this is a political thriller. (Ripped from today’s headlines as the cliche goes.)

Overall this film was well made and entertaining.  The casts delivered really sharp and tight performances and there was very good use of modern technology in this sort of search for clues thriller. However, that said this film in the end did not work for me.

At the heart of the story is a conspiracy simply to fantastic to be believed. I went in prepared to let a largish conspiracy go by my suspension of disbelief. When you are dealing with political thrillers, conspiracies are the rule of the day. For most of the film I was drawn into the plot and the characters and even the conspiracy itself.  Polanski had done a fine job of not sending me into eye-rolling, you-can’t-expect-me-to-buy-that land. Then in the last thirty minutes of the film, they reveal the big turn, the big surprise and it’s simply ridiculous. Governments, hell any organization, simply cannot perform to this sort of competence and long range planning.

To make matters worse in literally the last five minutes of the film they turn things around again with a series of clues that if you think about make no sense what so ever. I have no idea what the writers were thinking or smoking when they conceived this ending. IT simply makes no sense.

As such I must down check this movie. Going out with my sweetie-wife was pleasant, but the film was not.

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I’m Back

Well, the last two days have been quite a tour de force of headaches for me. Yes my new glasses still have not arrived from the lab and so I have been suffering my daily headaches at this time of year. Friday got to near migraine quality and I left work a couple of hours early so I could do nothing and let my eyes rest.

The most frustrating part of the last two days is that it brought production on Cawdor to a halt. Thursday night was reducing to typing in edits on the chapter 3 and no original writing. Friday my head hurt far too much for me to even think of stringing words together.

However, by a bit of luck I woke up this morning without a headache. I intended to spend some quality time with my sweetie-wife, as I have not been the most fun to be around lately, and later a double feature of films with friends.

A friend and co-worker, Rachael, (No that’s not  a typo that’s how she spells it.) Is both a fan of Zombie movies and The Terminator franchise. Yet somehow she has never seen the 1978 Dawn Of The Dead and even more surprising she has never seen The Terminator. This is going to be rectified today.

Then in the evening it will be card and board games.

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