Socially Sanctioned Schizophrenia

We writers are allowed, nay we are encourage to have voices in our heads. Unlike other poor souls we can take those voice that no one else is able hear and transform them into external characters. However, they all start off as voice in our heads.

I present to you a stylized conversation thrust upon me by one of my characters.

Character Incognito: You know, I’d be mighty useful in Exodus From Cawdor.

Me: You’re not going to be in Exodus from Cawdor, you die in Cawdor.

Character Incognito: I don’t have to die, son. There’s plenty of means we can hustle up to avoid that sad fate.

Me: Nope, I checked the outline you die on page 22 of it.

Character Incognito: Well now, that darn thing’s just a suggestion. You know like guidelines, you can ignore it if you want.

Me: It’s in the plan. You have to die in this story.

Character Incognito:  I don’t see that way at all. But, you’d love having me around for the next book. Sweet Baby Jesus you need me for balance if nothing else.

Me: I could find that in another character.

Character Incognito: Who tell?

Me:…

Character Incognito: That’s what I reckoned. You’re stuck and you want me in that next book, you need me in that book.

Me: Now you’re just ripping off Jack Nicholson.

Character Incognito: That must have been you. I never heard of the fella.

Me: You die in the story. Remember I got source material. (Confidently wiping my hands of the matter.)

Character Incognito: Now partner, that just slavish devotion to the text. You don’t have to copy some old englishman do you?

Me: It’s not slavish devotion it’s…respecting the source material.

Character Incognito: (suspiciously quiet)

Me: Sure you’d be fun and it’d open up a lot of opportunities, but there’s page 22. See look at it!

Character Incognito: Yup. That would have been a mite powerful scene I think. Shame you’ll have to lose it.

Me: Grumble

Character Incognito: You’ll thank me son, You’ll see.

I hate it when my characters are right.

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